Secondly

by Livia Ferrario
12/15/24

They say to take the road less traveled
but what if it’s just a stream
Tumbling churning in and out
Until I’m made of nothing but the burning desire of solid land

What if the road, my tumbling stream
Leads to nowhere but a distance
That stays miles away until the next is found

And then I fall again

What if the cycle of finding is all reversed
Each time I start to see an end
What if an end is never in sight
And I end up tumbling all the way back home again

The clocks lodged onto fluid walls
The ticks and tocks an unsteady beat
Yesterday turns into months ago
And today a year still withstanding

The calendars pages flip forward but mine likes to go back
And I’m thrown into the future where memory’s lost
When nothing and everything around me
Happens to all be a dream

Is the direction it shows black or too bright to see?
What if I’m falling but higher than I’ll ever get?
What if I keep feeling the clock’s hand moving just beyond my fingertips?
What if I never get there,
what if I never know where I want to get?

And now I’m falling again.

***

(This piece is part of our yearlong series called Heart Beets that features the work of a group of teen writers, giving us a glimpse into their journey through the school year.)