Haiku Barbie (Extremely Limited Edition, March 2021)

Sixty-two today

Don’t need plastic surgery

Since I am plastic

 

It’s been quite a ride

Based on a German sex doll

 Tamed for US girls

 

Best face was the first

With sideways-glancing snake eyes

And a vampy pout

 

I’ve held every job

From model to astronaut

Idiot savant

 

I’m friends with celebs

Yet hated by feminists

And sister Skipper

 

Sex with Ken, no way—

We lack the genitalia!

Yet kids keep trying

 

Sometimes worth thousands

If never removed from box

Other times dismembered

 

I was born this way

Don’t harsh on my measurements

I’m a fantasy

 

My sign is Pisces

I’ll meet you on the dance floor

I’ll be your mirror

 

For a birthday gift

I want a Covid vaccine

And of course, world peace

What are you looking for?