Then, You Were Gone
I once climbed into your bed
Soft white sheets
Cool against my skin
I watched you
Reading
Mouthing words
Your lips forming
Silent symbols
I traced my young fingers
Across the long
Black on white
Pages
You startled
As my body curled
Next to yours
Silently
You inched away
I watched
As your shadow
Absorbed darkness
I didn’t understand death
How it hurts
The drawing in and out
Of life
The blank stare
Into nothingness
I whispered
Into your ear
As I leaned over you
My tears dripped
Into your eyes
I traced my fingers
Across the blue lines
Pulsing at your temples
You had your ways,
Stacks of books
Piled high
On the floor
Postcards
With old stamps
Stuck between
Pages
You had your standards too, such as
Refusing to engage
In such silliness
As arguments about art
Let it be enough
Having seen
The long fingers
Of Lippo Lippi’s Madonna
In prayer
And how it brought back memories –
Of something no longer there
Let others argue
I watched you
Sitting back
Thinking
Silent
The ashes at the end
Of your cigarette
Long
Between your red tipped fingers
Your throne was solid
A place for you to judge
As the hours passed
As the red sky
Dimmed
For a minute
I thought the crooked mound of sheets
Formed by your body
Was your body