Dear future me,
Tell me how I did it. How did I stop being so ashamed to live and breathe? Tell me how it was that I stopped being scared of my own skin and finally allowed myself to exist without apology. I’m sorry we spent most of our life wishing, wanting and waiting are all I really feel I’m good for or know how to do. Tell me how it is we stop so I can do it sooner. Don’t keep me dehydrated from all the tears I’ve cried, fill me back up with water so I can come to life. I’m sorry I couldn’t be more. As much as I hate myself I know you may love me. Look back on me with kindness, the same kind that I can’t allow myself right now. Wash me of all fear and make us new again. Make it so it’s as if I was never touched. Fix me, make me be proud and have a future I can say I want. Tell me, show me. Write the answer in the sand and let me read. Be free, fly from the shackles of my chains that I still haven’t managed to escape. I envy the person you are, for it’s one I can’t be right now. Yet, I can’t help to love you as fiercely as I do. My reason to live, the moment I wait for and can’t stop thinking about. Free me, let me be as you are—I’ll be here when you do.
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