So, you’ve become interested in the idea of a financial domination (findom) relationship. You might even have already joined a findom website. Hey, who knows? You might already have found yourself a “paypig” – or, in this scenario, you are the paypig and want to find yourself a findomme or Goddess.
Before you start sending anyone money, though, or receiving tribute, let’s take a look at a simple question. What is a findom relationship? How do findom relationships actually work? What are the rules?
The Basics Of A Findom Relationship
Really, the main thing to note here is that, unlike a normal relationship, findom relationships are built on control. If you get into a traditional relationship with someone, there’s (usually) not an overt sense of control, right? There’s balance. Cooperation. Nobody is necessarily “in charge” – usually!
However, with a findom relationship, that isn’t the case. In this situation, the findomme is in total control. The paypig – the submissive party – is essentially giving up their financial control. And no, this isn’t like a service such as hiring an escort – in many cases, there’s no sexual return or “favours” granted by the findomme.
Essentially, the paypig gives up control over their finances because, among many reasons, they have a control kink. They might be someone who spends all day making big decisions in their professional life; now, they want to relinquish control and be at the mercy of someone else’s decisions.
The Importance Of Tribute
One of the most important functions in a findom relationship is tribute. A paypig essentially has to present themselves to a findomme whom they wish to connect with. To get their attention and to earn their dominance, they must provide “tribute” – an initial monetary payment or gift.
To even have the opportunity or privilege of a moment with that findomme, the paypig must be willing to invest. And remember, there’s no transactional aspect to this here; the kink, the humiliation, the loss of control, is enough. It’s extremely rare for findommes to give out sexual favors or similar in this kind of relationship. So, if you’re looking for that kind of thing, look elsewhere.
What’s The Point Of Financial Domination ?
As we noted above, it’s basically about giving up control. Some people have too much control over their day-to-day lives; they feel the incredible, eternal pressure to make decisions and be in charge. That can become exhausting, which is why many people get into a findom relationship.
Instead of having to make decisions and be in charge, they lose control completely. They are financially dominated by someone who either spends their money as they see fit, or tells them how to spend it – usually on the findomme themselves, or in other ways that might humiliate the paypig.
Think about how hard we work for our money, and the level of control money has on us. Lots of us work in professions or do things with our time that we would never consider if we didn’t get paid for them. Well, by being involved in a findom relationship, the domination of money itself is inverted!
In most cases, findom relationships are carried out entirely digitally. It’s actually very rare for a findomme to meet up with their paypig in person. They’ll usually communicate digitally, normally via phone or social media. That means no physical interaction and likely no meet-ups.
Most of the time, interactions begin using a findom website. People will advertise as findommes on there, or paypigs will create profiles and then reach out to findommes.
Again, this isn’t like hiring an escort or going to visit a dominatrix in person to get whipped or slapped around. It’s about control that moves beyond sexuality; this is about humiliation.
Inverting The Power Dynamics
The main reason why a lot of people get involved in findom relationships is to invert how they usually operate in life. Again, you’ll find that most paypigs are wealthy people who have a lot of control in their professional and personal lives. Control is intoxicating, but it’s also very demanding – and stressful.
Being able to give up that control by being a paypig is a huge release, mentally and emotionally. And hey, some of us just get a kick out of being humiliated. Working hard to make lots of money only to watch a stranger online spend it on crazy stuff, or telling you to buy them humiliating stuff? That’s a total inversion of what most people would want or expect from a relationship.
Let’s give a final example. A paypig is used to manage a company’s budget; they get to say yes or no to every purchase. That’s a lot of power, but also a lot of pressure. They might wish to feel what it’s like to be on the other side of that – so, they have a findomme. The findomme sets them a budget of their own money, or, in some cases, demands permission to spend even a pound or dollar of that money.
In the event that the “rules” of engagement are broken, the findomme can demand a “fine” or additional tribute.
A Total Transformation Of The Usual Rules
Can you see why this kind of power dynamic would be rather intoxicating? For many, it’s the perfect inversion of a standard relationship. For people with lots of power and pressure in their lives, this can be a wonderful way to let go, enjoy humiliation, and see life from another angle.
Interested in trying it out? You can become a paypig – or advertise yourself as a findomme goddess – by joining one of the many findom website platforms out there.
Photo: Mikhail Nilov via Pexels
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